At home in cohousing! (English)
A visit to the San Giorgio Cohousing in Ferrara 16 Oct 2022
A group of co-housing enthusiasts from Reggio Emilia went to visit the San Giorgio co-house in Ferrara this weekend to get a taste of a co-housing project, born as an idea in 2008 and made a reality in 2015. Alida, Daniela e Luciana, three members of the co-house gave up their Sunday to make us welcome in the shared indoor common area and the shared outdoor garden space facing the Po’ tributary river . Only 2 kilometres from the city center of Ferrara, but in a setting of verdant tranquility, it felt a long way from the furor of the city.
Why were we interested in cohousing? Well, our reasons were all remarkably similar, despite our outward apparent diversity. Many talked about leading more and more isolated lives, estranged or distanced from neighbours and family, living in spaces ever more designed for solo living, and that being part of a community that respected your privacy and private space but also offered places for sociality and conviviality, was appealing.
Some mentioned that getting older as a single person alone within a community offered a feeling of safety and security. The San Giorgio website reads “Better a neighbour near, than a friend a long way away”.
The difficulty of managing small children and elderly parents came up and how it often forced greater solitude on caregivers. Daniela divided the day between nursing her 97 year old mother at home and spending time with us. It was a particularly unpredictable period she shared warmly but the cohousing was an enormous resource to them both.
Alida who was our principal host for the day was minding her four year old grandson while coordinating 16 of us for an entire day! She did it with such grace and aplomb as perhaps only grandmothers know how to do but I found myself in awe of this, as I recalled days as a young mum juggling work and small children in a city center apartment alone. This four year old, dressed as a little devil in a Superman t-shirt alternated between drawing in Nonna’s apartment, to being in the common space with all of us, to playing on the grass outside. The space meant he was always safe and near and supervised. One more happy kid! One more amazing grandma!
For others, cohousing offered the chance to reduce consumption by sharing certain spaces and facilities, and live more ecologically. The collaborative process in the planning and building phase of the structure meant more affordable access to sustainable solutions like solar panels, water harvesting and the latest heating and insulation solutions. The residents we met said that their apartments offered maximum comfort. This San Giorgio building was constructed in wood X-Lam, equipped with photovoltaic panels and water harvesting for grey water. There is no gas connection and the value Eptot (Heating+hot water) = 2,2 KWh/mq anno, rating the building a CLASSE A+ (now A4).
My personal attraction to the co-housing concept comes from being a foreigner in Italy. I don’t have family and age old connections you make in a place you are born in, and growing up with small children, I sorely missed intergenerational relations I might have enjoyed, closer to home. Was I romanticising what a cohousing would offer me? Alida assured me that it’s something we all do! They spent years of dinners and meetings together, and attended skill-building conferences honing communication skills for arriving at consensus. The greatest test, Alida shared, is passing time together. Out of this it evolves naturally a commitment to take the project forward, or to let it go. This isn’t an overnight project. It’s a process.
In the end only two of the original group are in the final cohousing reality at San Giorgio. “Whatever happens, you’re engaging in a political project!” Alida said, “Cohousing is about, in our small way contributing to the community, engaging in new ways of being together, new ways of managing spending, new ways of using resources, new ways at arriving at consensus.” Many people who pulled out of the project as it progressed, did so, not because the process hadn’t served them, but because circumstances changed and the unexpected happened. Nothing is lost in the process of working towards a project like this, and a large social resource is created in the documenting and recording that process!
Someone observed that San Giorgio appeared stable and happy. “Not necessarily!” Alida retorts playfully, “It might look like that today! But we never know what’s next.” Two changeovers of inhabitants have occurred since it opened 7 years ago, and there will be more change in the future. “Its like a marriage”, Alida says, “the contract gets renewed every day. You need faith! You need commitment! And you need a willingness to resolve issues as they arise.”
The attitude to solve problems as they surface and the willingness to engage in sometimes difficult dialogues is essential. Communication is key and skills for arriving at consensus and confronting difficult conversations are always being honed. “Words can be windows or words can be walls!” says Alida as she adjusts horns on her grandson’s head. Its quite a gymnasium for getting on in the big wide world, I think, as the little devil threatens me from across the room with a red trident and a furrowed brow!
I knew no-one in the group before coming, but after a day of sharing food, ideas and possible future dreams, you feel more neighbourly! The women who received us at San Giorgio made us feel utterly welcome, included and grateful. Those are lovely things to feel!
So what do I suggest? Start having conversations about cohousing! You don’t have to go co housing tomorrow but this conversation needs to go mainstream! Co housing is no perfect solution but it can offer lots of things we need in society today. Reduced isolation for people of all ages and intergenerational connection; reduced consumption through shared facilities and services and attention to lifestyle choices; and new models for living closer together. Right now, more than ever, we need new models and new paradigms for coexisting. This is one worth paying attention to.
